Mystery solved!

Dear Internet,

My upstairs toilet has been unclogged for a while now, only I have forgotten to share the news because nobody reads my blog (yet?). But today, I decided I should tell you and let my house’s story serve as a cautionary tale to toilet-owners and -users everywhere! After all, everything on the internet lives forever, even sites hosted by Angelfire with guest books and clip art and sickening backgrounds, which maybe I will do a whole post about because they are fascinating artifacts, and the old internet is sooooo funny. Why is it that it’s funny and not nostalgia-inducing even though we were all there? And while we’re on the subject, have you noticed that The Sartorialist is hosted by EarthLink? Do you think some nerd at Vogue is just playing a trick on us? If yes, good job! It is really funny yet understated and a little bit…baffling?

Anyway, back to my contribution to the internet.

First, a re-cap: my dear housemate dropped something in the toilet without looking while the toilet was flushing. The mystery item clogged the toilet and could not be pulled out with a plunger. And! The mystery item could not even be extracted by a plumber. Doesn’t that sound like something that would render the bathroom unusable from now until eternity? (‘This used to be a bathroom, but then the toilet got clogged and no one in the world could fix it, so now we grow herbs in the tub.’) That didn’t happen, but the toilet did have to be removed (and then put back) in order to pull out the mystery prize, which was…

A four-ounce bottle of eye make-up remover.

Moral of the story: do not keep bottles this size (smallish medium) in the bathroom. They are small enough to go flying through the air but big enough to clog your toilet almost irreparably. Who knew.

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Mystery solved!

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